The reality of worship – What does God really want? This has caught me off guard many times in my lifetime. Yeah it’s true people say it’s a lifestyle; it’s all that you do, and I agree, yet when we come down to actually do that it’s so easy to interpret the bible in the way that we want to.
For instance, one morning I was on worship leading and we were in the middle of rehearsal just before the service. God reminded me of the scripture I had been reading the day before…“Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. FIRST go and be reconciled to your brother; THEN come and offer your gift.”
…Ouch! Now that was a hard pill to swallow. So to God my worship was not the songs that I was about to sing to him– but instead it was about me FIRST going before the service and humbling myself before my friend and apologizing and seeking forgiveness. Then he would receive my offering of praise and worship.
You see, we often come to God, at his altar and ask HIM to work out all our problems and issues with others - when he actually commands US to FIRST go and be reconciled with the other person BEFORE coming to him with adoration and praise.
I think we can over spiritualize our offerings to God, by bringing to Him all the issues we have with other people, yet never working it out with the person. Or the ‘spiritual’ act of asking God for direction in what we should do in the situation, when God’s Word is plan and simple.
So therefore is it an act of worship at all - or is it disobedience!
Until next time
Naomi
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2 comments:
Hey Paul, you sound really low. I think you identify some of the 'issue' you face in the second to last sentence. It sounds like expectations and socialisation into a system of what a Christian 'should be' have robbed you of being YOU and trying to fit a mould has left you feeling isolated and unsure of your fit. I know it can be hard but do you think you could find a way to step back and detach yourself from all that and then find who YOU are in God? He made you to be you, not to fit some stereotype laid out of what a Christian should be and how they should behave, experience God, etc. Each one of us is unique. I also wonder if you've experienced a spiritually abusive system in the past? The feelings you describe can come from such an experience. I wonder if there is someone you can trust to be totally objective and who can sit down with you and look at what distortions you see and help you find who YOU are? Who that is needs to be chosen cautiously and it may not be the first person you talk to. Is there someone who could even walk with you through finding the right person? If you can free yourself from what is holding you back and not try to force 'experiencing God' I feel it will come naturally in its own time. That's a process but from this place much growth and healing can happen and from that great things can flow. Blessings. Judy.
(P.S. If I can take the liberty of doing so, I'd suggest Clive or Ray may be great people to get you started on that journey).
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